Friday, November 13, 2009

Ugly Guitars


In my last post I talked about Brian May's glorious home-made masterpiece of a guitar: The Red Special.
Here's me with my Brian May Red Special replica:



 
Photo's by Lightning Heart

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As fun as it is talking about awesome guitars, I think it's more fun talking about UGLY guitars.
Guitars that should never have been made.
Guitars that are so hideous,  it makes Dazzling Horse weep on his pillow at night.
Everytime one of these monstrosities is created, a new born Pony will die.

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The Golden Dragon!

Dragons are Majestic and terrifying beasts. This guitar is just plain terrifying.
The spindly frog's legs are especially horrific.

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'Toot toot'

It's a known fact that the Saxophone is the cheesiest musical instrument of all time, except for its use in Madness songs.
Why turn the noble guitar into a cheese machine?
Whoever made this is an abomination.

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'???'

I love comic book heroes! Especially Batman, because he has no powers, just money and mad skills.
What this person was thinking, putting a Marvel Super Hero with DC Super Heroes, I just don't know.
It just doesn't happen.
This looks like it was whipped together with a child's Plaster and Paint kit.
I choose not to think of the pain and humiliation that this perfectly decent Stratocaster must have felt.
I just hope the owner was equally humiliated when he unveiled this brute.

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4 comments:

  1. hahahahah that first one looks like a chicken carcass!

    hideous

    hideously AWESOME!

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  2. These are just bizarre. I kind of like the saxophone one, though...there's something strangely appealing about making one instrument in the shape of another. It's a bit twisted.
    -Andi x

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  3. Excuse me while I wipe the vomit from the corners of my mouth...Do you remember renting a book from Goole library all about guitars and there was one in there that the body was painted as a kelloggs cornflakes box? It was the best book ever.

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  4. Haha Rosie, I do remember that book! It was awesome!

    Andi - It does have a kind of tacky appeal, like if it was hanging on a wood-paneled wall. But it would be intensely embarrassing to use it as an actual instrument I think :P

    ReplyDelete

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